Week 12 , Expectations & Resentments

“Unrealistic expectations are premeditated resentments”

It is our job to identify our needs, and then determine a balanced way of getting those needs met. We expect our Higher Power and the Universe – not one person – to be our source.

I believe it’s unreasonable to expect anyone to be able or willing to meet our every request. We are responsible for asking for what we want and need. It’s the other person’s responsibility to freely choose whether to respond to our request. If we try to coerce or force another to be there for us, that’s controlling.
There’s a difference between asking and demanding. We want love that is freely given.
It is unreasonable and unhealthy to expect one person to be the source meeting all our needs. Ultimately, we will become angry and resentful, maybe even punishing, toward that person for not supporting us as we expected.
It is reasonable to have certain and well-defined expectations of our spouse, children, and friends.
If a person cannot or will not be there for us, then we need to take responsibility for ourselves in that relationship. We may need to set a boundary, alter our expectations, or change the limits of the relationship to accommodate that person’s unavailability. We do this for ourselves.
It is reasonable to sprinkle our wants and needs around and to be realistic about how much we ask or expect of any person. We can trust ourselves to know what’s reasonable.
The issue of expectations goes back to knowing that we are responsible for identifying our needs, believing they deserve to get met, and discover an appropriate, satisfactory way to do that in our life.

 

I had a wonderful day last Saturday with my oldest daughter, Emma. When she was 3 years old I took an afternoon off from work to take her to watch her first movie in a movie theatre. The movie was “Beauty and the Beast”. I remember how awe struck she was by the huge screen and booming speakers. That was a very happy dad moment for me and I won’t ever forget it. That was 25 years ago and now Disney has released a new, live-action remake of the original.

eu_batb_flex-hero_header_r_430eac8d

I had initially thought it was just something fun and silly and nostalgic to do with Emma and we could have a few laughs together. Well the movie is very well done and I was a little shocked to discover that I was enjoying the movie. It was great and I can’t imagine anyone not enjoying it. Well done Disney. We kicked around the mall for awhile and then went for a nice dinner at Eau Claire. My Saturdays can’t get much better than that.

 

I got home from work Wednesday and bumped into my neighbour, in the back lane. I asked her how she was doing. Her reply was “shitty”. So I stopped to talk to her and found out that her dog, a black Labrador, had died on Saturday. Vader was his name and he and my dog Hoover always had time to bark at each other through the fences and the shrubs and sniff each other’s butts, as dogs do, when they were on the sidewalk together. He was a year younger than Hoover and died from the cancer that was discovered in him only 3 weeks prior. It’s quite sad actually and makes me appreciate the time I have with Hoover, just a little more.

IMG_2791

Hoover The Dog

Here’s a Ted Talk I recently watched that touched a nerve with me. It’s about finding the courage to speak up against prejudice and bigotry. It’s only 4:18 if you want to take the time to watch it.

 

The song this week is Hey Bebe from Rhiannon Giddens new album, Freedom Highway

rhiannon-giddens-freedom-highway-peets-lyrics-1200x628

 

The quote this week:

“The world would be a nicer place if everyone had the ability to love as unconditionally as a dog.”

M.K. Clinton
Thanks for dropping by…….I appreciate it……

Week 10 & God

 

If you forget everything but God you have remembered everything that matters

 

from Mitch Teemley

 

My daughter Olivia has been accepted into the Ph.D. program in the Faculty of Social Work for September 2017 at University of Calgary and I am very proud of her and happy for her!

Lori and I were at the Jubilee Auditorium last Thursday to take in Lyle Lovett and John Hiatt, for not just an evening of great music but one that included a great deal of banter between the two which was often very funny,but always entertaining. They have turned their travelling music show into theater

The song this week is White Boy Lost in the Blues , by Lovett and Hiatt.

208152a

Lyle Lovett and John Hiatt

The quote this week is the following from Mother Teresa.

“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the water to create many ripples.” 

Thanks for dropping in today and I hope you’ll check it out again next week! Have a great day and week ahead……….

Banff and Week 9

Lori and I spent this past weekend in Banff enjoying a gift the kids got us for Christmas and of course enjoying Banff and all that it offers. We stayed at the Caribou as we usually do when we’re in Banff and we get what we expect. It’s a nice hotel and a great location. And there’s an amazing hot pool on the main floor.

The week prior it had been quite warm and I was concerned that the warm temperatures might put a damper on activity but the concern wasn’t required. We had a nice seasonal temperature of minus 15 with some fresh snow. It was a beautiful picturesque weekend in the mountains.

We got to Banff Friday at about 4PM and had a walk through the shops on main street. We spent about 2 hours searching through the shops and checking everything out. There’s a few unique hike/climb/ski stores in Banff that you wont find elsewhere or if you do find it somewhere else, like the Patagonia store, the store is bigger in Banff with a much greater selection.

We went out for supper at The Keg and then back to the room to chill for the night.

Saturday afternoon we had a guided hike in Johnston Canyon which took a total of about 4 hours and in great company, with some people from San Diego, NYC, Massachusetts and a couple of paramedics from Australia. The canyon was beautiful with all the fresh snow and so much snow off the trail. Water seeps from the rocks in the canyon in the summer but in the winter it’s frozen and presents itself as a magnificent turquoise mass of ice. There’s still lots of fast flowing open water and so clear right now because it doesn’t carry all the silt it might in summer. This is a great short hike and I recommend it for all and it’s quite doable by most people I know.

16939292_10155335084677448_5767008073240332950_n

At the Upper Falls enjoying some hot chocolate 

The mountain air had created quite an appetite but before going out for supper we hit the hot pool in our hotel first. It felt amazing after the hike, the mountain air and the cool temperatures of minus 15. We cleaned up and went to Pacini’s for supper and I also highly recommend this restaurant. It is neither high end or low end, but really good food, large portions and the restaurant was large, roomy and modern.

Sunday was a sleep in, grab a Starbucks and drive the hour back home. Just another great weekend with my best friend!

Don’t forget that all National Park Passes are free this year in celebration of Canada’s 150th birthday

 

Speaking of hockey, the Calgary Flames made it 5 wins in a row last night beating the LA Kings in OT ! I don’t want to get too excited , well actually I do. If the Flames can move past Anaheim and the sun and the moon and the stars align, we could see and Edmonton/Calgary first round playoff season! The trade deadline was today at 1 PM MST and about 30 minutes to deadline the Flames picked up  Forward, Curtis Lazar from Ottawa ,along with Defenseman Mike Kostka in return for a second round pick in 2017 and Defenseman  Jyrki Jokippaka. Ive already read that the 22 year old Lazar is looking to turn his game around in Calgary and Calgary gave up very little for him. Good trade by the Flames.

 

 

 

The song this week is from Linda Ortega.  Ortega is a Canadian born country singer from Toronto who now resides in Nashville. This song is off her latest album, Faded Gloryville, and the song is titled I Aint The Girl. Check Ortega out on iTunes,Amazon or YouTube. She’s definitely country so if you like country you’re gonna like Ortega.

3895a116a921a6af7fcb86c282c4fb48

 

 

 

The quote this week is from Evan Esar.

“You can’t do anything about the length of your life but you can do something about it’s width and depth”

 

 

Thanks for dropping by and I hope you’ll do the same next week………..